Tosin Sanni's Official Blog

Dealing with Negativity: Don’t Isolate Yourself.

 

I naturally love my own company. I don’t miss people a lot. Haha! I enjoy being by myself – just give me a good book and you won’t hear from me for hours. In addition to this is the fact that I used to be very conscious of what people thought about me. I wanted to appear perfect and seem like I had it all together. I never wanted anyone to think I had struggles or areas where things weren’t perfect. So if I was going through a tough time, I would simply withdraw from friends and everyone. I would stay locked in and try to figure things out on my own. I would even get offended if people started asking me if something was wrong with me! I’m thinking back and wondering “where did I get this idea that I needed to keep up a perfect appearance from?!”

This isolation and withdrawal was one of the tools that the enemy was using to keep me bound, sad and constantly wallowing in self pity. I was so worried about people thinking something was wrong with me because I’d had various “failed relationships”. As if there’s anything new under the sun! Truth is, there are people that have had it even worse than I had! I needed to have a good company of friends, a support system or at least a trusted friend that could help me through my tough times. Thank God I eventually realized it.

I had become close to this lady who would later be such a tool in God’s hands to bring me healing and restore my confidence in Him but I didn’t know how much I would need her.

One day, while I was grieving over the end of a relationship that was already leading to marriage, I reached out to her. I had been so sad and depressed that day that I wasn’t sure I could make it through the day myself. She ran down to me and began to speak to me. She spoke of her experiences and also spoke the word of God to my hearing. She spoke with so much confidence in God’s word that my tears began to dry and I listened intently with renewed hope! By the time we were done talking, I felt more certain than ever that God’s beautiful plans for my life were just about to unfold; that my best days were ahead of me and not behind me; that there was absolutely nothing wrong with me! That conversation changed my life and outlook forever! Today, I’m more than glad that I reached out.

Loved one, you cannot do life by yourself. Oh I know that not everyone can be trusted but I also know that God sends people our way to make our lives’ journeys easier. He sends people to us to hold our hands through tough times; to be the voice of reason when we need it. Don’t let the devil isolate you! You need godly counsel and wisdom; godly relationships. Someone or people that will remind you of God’s love, remind you that you’re not alone and provide support.

You must understand that no one has a perfect life and you’re not an exception. You don’t need to prove a point to anyone. You don’t need anyone to think your life is perfect. Your self worth cannot be based on other people’s perceptions of your life’s situation. A healthy self image says “Oh yes, I’m imperfect and even though not everything in my life is perfect, I’m grateful for the things that are working out and I’m just as perfect as I need to be”

Ask God to bring godly relationships your way. God put us in families, communities, churches and groups for a reason. He knew we would need each other.

I pray that God sends you friends that build you up, help you in your faith walk and strengthen your confidence in Jesus!

I pray that you’ve been blessed by this series on “Overcoming Negativity”. Thank you for your comments and contributions! I enjoy reading from you. I look forward to sharing more with you in subsequent posts.

Love always.

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4 Comments

  1. Joy

    AMEN to destiny helpers prayers.
    You are such a blessing to me.
    God inspire you more in Jesus Name.
    Love you loads

    • Oluwatosin

      Amen! Thank you, you’re such a blessing too! Love you

  2. Loveth Patrick

    I really enjoy reading your share if experiences and lessons and always look forward to reading more, it really uplifts my spirit and gives me hope to keep on keeping on as I am the shoes u used to be. Thank you very much for being bold and courageous enough to be a blessing to many, especially me

    • Oluwatosin

      Praise God! I’m glad you’re being blessed. Thank you for always reading. I look forward to hearing your testimony.